Think about what you could do to enhance any qualities that might need some work.

To strengthen any qualities I need to work on, I can keep reflecting on myself and seek guidance from supervisors or mentors. I can practise active listening and empathy in everyday life, and pay attention to my own feelings, biases, and reactions. Continuing with training, workshops, and learning experiences will help me improve my skills, and taking care of myself will allow me to be the best counsellor I can be.

Reflect: On childhood

Reflect on the connections between your childhood experiences (both useful and unhelpful) and present personality/behaviour patterns

I am very familiar with the process of looking into my childhood and noticing patterns. I can see patterns of defence, self-neglect, self-doubt, and self-criticism, many of which are connected to my parents’ personalities and ego structures. At the same time, I also grew up with a sense of reliance and the capacity to work through these patterns, which has helped me navigate life and relationships more effectively. These childhood experiences have shaped who I am today, influencing both my personality and my behaviour.

As a mother, I raised my children with an anxious attachment style, and they show some of the same patterns I experienced. However, they seem to have “upgraded” along the way and have not experienced the same level of emotional turbulence that I did, although they have faced their own anxieties and panic attacks. Reflecting on this, I can see how my own experiences of struggle and resilience have shaped my empathy, patience, and understanding qualities that I bring into my relationships and will carry into my work as a counsellor.